Honesty

So, it has been an interesting day.  I have been fine, but around me the emotions and such have been a bit ragged.  So I will revert to something I decided was going to be the 'blog topic of the day' much, much earlier on.

Mistress was talking to me earlier about the fact that I haven't told my parents about Sir, and the fact that due to that, my parents possibly have a skewed vision of what is going on over here, and especially how Mistress and I relate.  She isn't quite annoyed at me about it, I verified that, but she is - well, she doesn't lie, and she doesn't care what people think when she tells the truth.

Now, how to put down my thinking about this issue?  There was no way that I wasn't going to come over here, my closer friends I have told the Sir situation to, and the other friends and acquaintances don't need to know my ultra personal business ever.  However, when it comes to my family, I didn't see the point of telling them about it, as it would just give them another worry about me, and goodness, they might even have tried to talk me out of coming.  The parents will be told the full situation before they come to visit next month, but I just thought it easier to do it from Here than There (when Here and There have been switched from what they were two days ago).  I might even bring the full and frank truth explanation forward a lot more than I thought of doing, if Mistress is as disappointed, that's the word, if she is as disappointed as I think she is.

I guess I do care about what my parents think about me.  And I felt earlier in the day that I had to apologise for that.  Everyone else important knows, and the unimportant ones can go to hell if needs be.  I might actually draft up an email to Mum tonight.

Mistress said that I could have told them that I wanted to move to Perth to be closer to her, and leave it at that.  But my thinking is that would also be an omission of the truth of sorts, avoiding the fact of how much emotion I have for her, and then they would worry about me finding a flat or something.  As I said to the Boss when we were talking about this, we have very different worldviews.  I have always wanted to use the word schadenfreude in a sentence, but I guess this isn't the time, yet.

I have used Gotterdammurung as a blog title in the past though lol.

A thought I had is that Mum and Dad have the very clear idea that the Mistress and I thing is a new relationship, and could very well go wrong (in their minds at least), so they haven't instilled expectations in the whole enterprise as yet.  Which Mistress maybe sort of believes they have.  Maybe I should have kept quiet to Mistress that Mum had the thought of inviting her to a family vacation later in the year.  I dunno.

That stress headache from yesterday still hasn't gone away.  But it has lessened.

Anyways, with the rest of what has happened this afternoon, I am well down the list of priorities for her.

On the positive side, we had a good, quick, discussion earlier this morning.  I went into the whole 'I am willing to do anything for you' spiel, which, unsurprisingly, has a far deeper impact in person than over the phone or on email.  She will delegate everything she can to me, and concentrate on the things only she can do.  She told me I am her trusted lieutenant.  Which got me closing my eyes and made my heart swell.

Sir is okay with that plan as well.

So much else has happened with the day, that it has almost been as overwhelming as the worst of my freak outs when I was There.  But I have been as brave as I can, and done my best, both to cope and to be there for Mistress.