The job I thought I had a firm offer for was un-offered yesterday. I was a tad unhappy about it, and of course the first person I talked to on the phone after I got the news was Mistress. And I burst into tears toward the end of the call. Which was apparently a fail.
Even more of a fail was the fact that I followed the call up with a text shortly afterwards. The oh woe is me, the world hates me, let's curl up and die variety. If the tears annoyed Mistress, that text absolutely made her angry at me. When she got home, she said the job thing was a minor setback, there is no need to be so melodramatic about it all, maybe the next time this sort of thing happens text her the initial information rather than ring her and cry. She will train me to change my perception about things, to get some perspective. Yeah, I have had an easy life, and most of my traumas have been self inflicted - Mistress has had all sorts of crap happen with her, especially the last few years. She told me, if my parents die, or I am in a car accident, or assist some sort of trauma, yes, then I can ring her and cry, but as for a job going south, no, that isn't worth tears to Mistress about.
And to take out my frustration and disappointment in an assertive manner with those that caused the problem - recruitment agents and such - not on her or Sir. It's stupid in a way, all through my life I have shown more of my negative sides to those whom I love and care for then virtual strangers. Hopefully I can get trained out of it, because there is no way that I am leaving Here anytime soon. Hopefully? Of COURSE Mistress will train me to think positively.
Ended the day giving her moral support and Coke as she scraped paint off one of the window sills. Sounds silly, but even that was quality time. She enjoys my company, and only flares up at me in anger for the shortest periods, when I am being a complete and utter dimwit.
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