Sunday, March 6, 2005

vrrrrRRRRRMMMMmmmmm!

I wasn't going to post today, but just on launchcast before (the Yahoo internet radio station, basically) Tubthumping by Chumbawumba came on. Mmm, memories of living in the UK, and especially the first couple of months, when I was working in a pub rather than in an office where I should have been LOL. But socialising with workmates, including this lanky tall girl from Wagga Wagga, who I had a huge crush on LOL, socialising after work at a pub the next suburb over, and dancing to Tubthumping and Jump Around by House of Pain and Parklife by Blur, etc.

God I loved London, and wish I could have stayed there, and we are talking hmm about seven years ago now... just I guess was my bulletproof time of my life, where I was actually socialising lots, even though it was still primarily with workmates, and still primarily Fridays only, there just seemed a much larger group or something. Hmm, I feel old all of a sudden, I see workmates now in there early twenties going out in large groups - and I still miss London...

Hmm, another memory tumbling around my head, the whole travelling to and from to see H trips, and leaving Belfast via Heathrow and missing my flight via Singapore where my bags were going and flying over Greenland and North America and the Pacific instead. Beautiful views from thirty thousand feet of the glaciers and the North West Territories and flying at night time around LA is always amazing, either the Pacific or the city to view. Anyways, I wasn't going to mention the scenery, rather Vitamin C singing Friends Forever or Remember the Titans, or going to see her, the awfulness of Autumn In New York or the brainless joy of Coyote Ugly or Bedazzled - Brendan Fraser is so underrated as an actor LOL...

Now have Interstate Love Song by Stone Temple Pilots playing, and the memory that falls out of my head for this is it must have been summer 94/95 (remember, we are mucked up season wise in the southern hemisphere) and just before or after going to see REM Crowded House and Grant Lee Buffalo (if I have the last name right) and socialising with my former schoolmates, having a picnic at one of the parks in Upper Hutt, and just enjoying their company and god I miss that - Upper Hutt is a hole to live in, but it does have its good moments...

And now Up by Shania on the radio. Makes me think of my time in Canada with K, and Shania hosting the Junos at the Corel Centre LOL, watching on TV and the piece de resistance being the Habs inspired outfit with the hot pants and the thong straps over the top of her hips mmm LOL. And yes, this is turning into one of THOSE maudlin types of posts...

I think I seriously need to go out more on the weekends, that would be a start, and not just to movies or shopping malls - I remember my time in London, going to socialise to watch sports matches from back home. Or back home, catching up with the mates for beers or indoor cricket or - hmm, think that phase died off when I started feeling too old to go to bars, all those seventeen year old teeny boppers LOL. Or even TA, even though his favourite and only topics of conversations were cricket or rugby or league, talking to him or going with him to the rugby league or cricket LOL was good... or Ottawa, just having the weekends free and deciding to go somewhere on the spur of the moment, or at least the spur of Friday's decision moment.

Brisbane is just too much in my comfort zone I think. But was just thinking, in five years I will have the rose coloured glasses on and will think I had the greatest of times here and now. No doubt :)

Tori Amos Silent All These Years now - thinking of my teenagehood in Upper Hutt now. Reading Elfstones of Shannara until four in the morning to finish it off, think that was the first book I did that with, or sitting on my windowseat reading Memory Sorrow and Thorn when it FIRST came out LOL. Or listening to Losing My Religion again and again as I took pill after pill trying to OD, and then wandering off to school to do the glorious flame out or whatever it was - I look back on the Paul then and can hardly recognise him to the person I am now. Sure, there is still the self doubt and a tinge of self loathing, but not to the extent that I want to harm myself. Or did I just say too much LOL :)

Although as regular readers may have noticed (or just those who hit the archive buttons), depression can fairly easily hit me, and is one of the major reasons why I came back from Canada, self harm to the EXTENT that I was back in 93 is a different person, as it were.

Anyways, just a quick note about the title of the post, I was going to mention the Formula One a lot earlier than I have - Renault got one and three, Schumacher crashed out, Coulthard got fourth, ahead of either McLaren LOL. And hence the vrrm in the title - maudlin memory service will resume shortly LOL.

And just a quick one on that Italian journalist in Iraq and the Italian agent killed. Just a thought that if it had been Italian troops killing an American secret service agent retrieving a hostage, the story would be a lot different than it is currently. Yes, we can spray a car with four hundred bullets and lock people up without charge for years on end and take pictures of us torturing Iraqis, but OMG we better not have Janet Jackson's tits or Saving Private Ryan on TV LOL. Well, that point kind of diverged from where it was intended to go in the first place, but I am sure you get my drift :)

All The Small Things by Blink 182 - memory this sets off is being in Cuba Street Mall in Wellington at the music store, just after having eaten a meal at KFC in Manners Mall LOL, and for some reason it gets mixed in with queuing up to see Live at Queens Wharf a few years ago, and bumping into RB and KA and catching up with them. I miss home LOL and London and Canada and and and...

Although Mr Brighteyes by The Killers makes me think of my/our current local pub and playing pool with MG, and drinking New Year's with SW and kicking on from there, after cocktails and stuff... was talking to SW on Friday night, and she is so discouraged about things in general, let alone work. There will be some good memories from this current Brisbane phase of my life I am sure - lol, remembering back to sitting across from this gorgeous creature about this time last year while job searching and she seemed interested in me in a nice conversation kind of way :)

Anyways, I am sure everyone who reads this is bored to tears by now, and those of you who have hung on are just boredom junkies or something - LOL it's not like terrestrial TV or even a hundred channel cable - there are BILLIONS of websites out there, and at least HALF of them must be better than my ramblings, so go, see, even conquer if you feel like it.

This edition of Pauly Central is over and out :)
Paul

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