And just think, this time last week I was not stressed at all. A seizure, the possibility of money issues, and being home alone, how easily things can change.
It started with me trying out a new budget measure of putting all spare money towards my debt repayments almost on pay day itself, rather than wait until the next pay as I usually do/did, and see how much spare I have then. Then last week, after I had made that decision, I was counting down my spare cash in my head, what with contact lens solution, recharging my mobile phone, public transport - ick, worrying about money, how stupid LOL.
I didn't think I was stressed before having my seizure on Thursday, but looking back, and that money issue could have been enough to start me off bleah. Obviously it doesn't take much. And then after the whole seizure thing, the thinking of getting a Medicare card again (and the fear of getting rejected), the cost of a doctor if I don't get a Medicare card, or if they don't bulk bill, and the cost of prescriptions themselves.
And for the first time ever, one of these crises is happening when I am home alone, so I don't have anyone to easily borrow some money from, at least until Saturday. Family you feel you can easily borrow money from for a week or two, anyone else and the whole 'self sufficiency' myth that I tell myself starts to fall apart.
I went into work yesterday, and, even though I dodged talking to actual customers - I was doing the work that was coming in by email - the whole thing of keeping a happyish face around colleagues was exhausting. I know that I didn't have to put on the happy face to workmates, but it's just my personality anyways, I guess.
Got home, felt exhausted, cut my hand opening up one of the dog food cans, and over the last couple of days have completely lost my appetite, so am only finding myself eating when I am hungry, and therefore my stomach isn't sure of how it is feeling at all - upset, I think the best term could be.
Oh, and have woken up with a sore throat this morning. Only have training at work for most of the day today, so will see how I feel by the time that training ends.
Something good is bound to happen this week :) fingers crossed.
Pauly
It started with me trying out a new budget measure of putting all spare money towards my debt repayments almost on pay day itself, rather than wait until the next pay as I usually do/did, and see how much spare I have then. Then last week, after I had made that decision, I was counting down my spare cash in my head, what with contact lens solution, recharging my mobile phone, public transport - ick, worrying about money, how stupid LOL.
I didn't think I was stressed before having my seizure on Thursday, but looking back, and that money issue could have been enough to start me off bleah. Obviously it doesn't take much. And then after the whole seizure thing, the thinking of getting a Medicare card again (and the fear of getting rejected), the cost of a doctor if I don't get a Medicare card, or if they don't bulk bill, and the cost of prescriptions themselves.
And for the first time ever, one of these crises is happening when I am home alone, so I don't have anyone to easily borrow some money from, at least until Saturday. Family you feel you can easily borrow money from for a week or two, anyone else and the whole 'self sufficiency' myth that I tell myself starts to fall apart.
I went into work yesterday, and, even though I dodged talking to actual customers - I was doing the work that was coming in by email - the whole thing of keeping a happyish face around colleagues was exhausting. I know that I didn't have to put on the happy face to workmates, but it's just my personality anyways, I guess.
Got home, felt exhausted, cut my hand opening up one of the dog food cans, and over the last couple of days have completely lost my appetite, so am only finding myself eating when I am hungry, and therefore my stomach isn't sure of how it is feeling at all - upset, I think the best term could be.
Oh, and have woken up with a sore throat this morning. Only have training at work for most of the day today, so will see how I feel by the time that training ends.
Something good is bound to happen this week :) fingers crossed.
Pauly
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